Life with a Newborn

I truly believe I was made to be a mom. I could spend all day sitting at staring at my little baby in wonder and amazement. Then.. young, infant, 7 week old baby Bode rips the loudest, wettest fart I’ve ever heard and I’m brought back to reality. I’m still flabbergasted at the amount of gas that can come out of such a tiny human. Hilarious.

Honestly though, the first 6 weeks of Bode’s life have been the best weeks of my life. He really is a pretty easy baby. Of course there are nights here and there where he gets pissed off beyond belief and there is just no way to figure out what’s wrong with him. He’s not hungry. He’s not wet. He just slept ALL day so I guess he’s not tired. I just slam my head in the door a few times then I feel better. I’m came to realize that just because my baby is crying doesn’t mean I actually suck at being a mom. Being a mom has changed me. I don’t do smells. Well, I used to not do smells. Now, I have a baby that has acid reflux and get spit up on after half of his feedings. Do I get up and immediately change my clothes? Nope. I’m wearing that regurgitated boobie milk for the rest of the day. I had never even changed a dirty diaper in my life before I had a child. I really can’t even remember a time where I changed a wet diaper. Well, that’s changed. As soon as I get a diaper changed, it instantly fills back up with pee again. Like FULL OF PEE. Bode is still in newborn diapers and I swear sometimes I will take a pee soaked diaper off him that weighs 5 pounds.

Getting ready for the day (showering, hair, makeup, breakfast) is a process that has had to be completely relearned. I used to be able to do the prior in under an hour. I prided myself on the fact that I can get ready at lightening speed. So when I started back to work this week and it took me 1 hour and 40 minutes, I figured I better start getting my shit together. SO much pre-planning is required to be able to get myself ready and an infant fed and ready and out the door by 7 in the morning. I use a Medela Pump In Style electric double breast pump and have that bad boy set up and ready for action so when I get out of the shower I can strap that thing on (hands free pumping bra – get one) and put my face on and dry my hair. If I can be completely ready by the time I feed Bode a bottle at 6am (of freshly pumped, warm boobie milk – he usually drinks about 4 to 5 ounces per feeding), I’m making good time. I just then have to feed myself, which is pretty much always a 3 egg spinach omelet, get my car loaded with diaper bag, breast pump, food and snacks for the day, a bunch of other shit that I can’t remember, and last, but not least Bode. Also, I have to coax big Beau into being a good dog by threatening him with his life right before I walk out the door. (It actually does seem to affect him if I act mad before I leave….. Though there’s still a good chance something will be torn up when I get home).

Life with a newborn may not be a walk in the park like my old life used to be, but I wouldn’t trade it. I still get to do all the things I used to do, except drink wine. Jacob and I had our first date the night after Valentines day and I had two glasses of wine and was drunk. No joke. I pumped and tested my milk with my little alcohol testing strips (I knew it was going to be tainted, but I still wanted to try those things out). It was bad, duh, and I felt a little piece of my soul die when I poured 5 ounces of breast milk straight down the drain. Liquid gold just right down the shitter. I will not be drinking much for a long while again. We are getting right back in the swing of things in our house, I think it’s time to get pregnant again.

NOT.

Here is a look at our newborn pictures. They were all so, so good. Excuse the quality of some of them, I had to take a picture of the pictures. Tacky, but they’re so sweet I had to share. Patty Jessee is hands down the best photographer around.
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4 thoughts on “Life with a Newborn

    • babymommasaiz says:

      Having a newborn is quite the experience! It’s amazing and there’s nothing like looking at looking at your tiny human knowing you made them. But then things like this happen – Bode had a blowout this morning all over himself and my mom… A pool of liquid baby poop just sitting in her lap. Hilarious and disgusting.

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